


Familiar

by AoiTsukikage



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-30
Updated: 2016-07-30
Packaged: 2018-07-27 16:02:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7624966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AoiTsukikage/pseuds/AoiTsukikage
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He doesn't know a lot about Leo these days, it seems, so when he does something that's actually familiar Izumi has a really hard time saying no to him.<br/>Maybe it should tell him something that 'familiar' is 'composing using his skin as a canvas', but he's not in any position to be picky about these sorts of things. (Leo/Izumi, slight Lionheart spoilers)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Familiar

"Somebody could walk in."  
  
"I don't mind."  
  
"You wouldn't," Izumi grunts, laying himself forward over the desk and wondering if there's a more comfortable place they could be doing this. Not that Leo would listen if he suggested they move, since he knew well enough by now that when inspiration struck Leo tended to drop everything so he could write.   
  
Or paint, as the case may be, and Izumi's pretty sure there must be a pen and paper around but Leo's apparently decided that paint and his skin make a better combination.   
  
He winces when the brush strokes across his shoulder-blades, slightly cold and with just enough pressure to be ticklish. "You know you're my muse, Sena," Leo hums, his free hand stroking down Izumi's back in a move that's entirely unnecessary.   
  
Izumi wants to reply, because Leo probably says that to everyone, but...  
  
But he doesn't know if he can anymore. He doesn't know a lot about Leo these days, it seems, so when he does something that's actually familiar Izumi has a really hard time saying no to him.   
  
Maybe it should tell him something that 'familiar' is 'composing using his skin as a canvas', but he's not in any position to be picky about these sorts of things.   
  
"What? No comeback about how I'm annoying?" Leo's hand curls around his waist, the pads of his fingers pressing lightly into Izumi's skin. "That's not the Sena I know."  
  
"You already know you are," Izumi grunts, slumping even more onto the wooden surface and flinching when his bare chest comes into contact with a section of it that hasn't been warmed yet by his skin. "It's a waste of breath for me to say it over and over again."  
  
"Mm," Leo sounds thoughtful, the brush moving down Izumi's back.  Izumi doesn't even know if Leo's writing notes anymore or if he's just scribbling nonsense. "I haven't heard you say it for a long time."  
  
"And whose fault is that?" Izumi snaps, harsher than he intends to. His body tenses up and he hears Leo let out a concerned little noise.   
  
"Relax," Leo urges, and Izumi finds himself complying despite the sudden burst of resentment that's curling in his chest. Leo doesn't say anything else, silent and thoughtful in a way he never is outside of when he's composing. Izumi finds himself almost lulled to sleep by the repetitive strokes of the brush and by Leo's warm fingers gently stroking the skin above his hip. "You took care of them, Sena," he eventually whispers. "You kept them together."  
  
"I did shit," Izumi snorts, although he's far too relaxed now to feel truly angry. "Thank Naru-kun and Kasa-kun for that. The only thing I did was almost ruin it all."  
  
"You're too hard on yourself," Leo leans closer and Izumi can feel his hair tickling the back of his neck before a soft kiss is pressed to the nape of it. "My little Sena."  
  
"Don't patronize me," he murmurs, though the sigh he lets out at the touch is impossible to conceal. "Don't act like nothing's changed. Like you didn't fucking abandon us for months."  
  
Leo goes off on a tangent about aliens then and Izumi tunes him out entirely, trying to regulate his breathing and slip back into that almost hypnotic calmness he was feeling only a few moments ago.   
  
It doesn't work, because when Leo's like this - when he's acting like a stranger, when he's not the Leo that Izumi knew - it's almost uncomfortable to be with him.   
  
"And you know, if I could call them back, I..."  
  
"I have to go," Izumi stands up suddenly, because the tolerable level of resentment has changed to flat-out anger and he won't... _can't_...take that out on Leo. "Tennis club, you know," he clears his throat, and it's as good an excuse as any because at least there's showers there.  He’s not going home with paint all over his body.   
  
"I'm not finished-"  
  
"It's probably not very good anyway," Izumi feels a sharp stabbing pain in his gut as the words slide from his mouth because they're lies. Everything Leo writes is good.   
  
No, everything Leo writes is _brilliant_ , and at one time Izumi would have said that Leo's inspiration shouldn't be wasted on a bastard like him.   
  
But now...who knows if Leo's music is the same as it was.   
  
Everything else has changed, after all.   
  
"Sena..." Leo sounds a little surprised, but when his hands reach out again Izumi feels powerless to move away.   
  
It's all wrong, though. From behind, when he wasn't looking at Leo, it was easy to pretend things were the same. But now, staring into the eyes he once knew and seeing a stranger gazing back, Izumi feels _nothing_ and that perhaps scares him more than anything. "Don't. Please," his voice comes out choked, far less steady than he would have wanted it, but Leo pulls back like Izumi's skin has suddenly burned him.   
  
Leo laughs, the sound making Izumi flinch because it's merely a mockery of the warmth and amusement that once coloured his voice.   
  
It's wrong. It's _all_ wrong, and Izumi barely takes the time to pull his t-shirt on and grab his bag before rushing from the room, the hollow sound of Leo's laughter echoing through the halls like a vengeful spectre and chasing him until he finally pushes through the doors into the blessedly silent outside air.   


000

  
He's not even sure how he makes it to the locker room or into the shower, hands frantically scrubbing at his skin until he realizes he won't actually be able to see if he's getting all of the paint off. Maybe he's washing away the best thing Leo's ever written, but he doesn't care. 

He doesn't. 

He can't let himself. 

He _can't._

That he's crying doesn't even register until he realizes that the warm liquid dripping down his face isn't from the shower, and he lets his legs give out, reducing him to nothing more than a sobbing, undignified, paint-streaked mess on the shower stall floor. 

There's footsteps outside then, and he can't rein in the utterly heartbreaking noises he's making in time to hide his presence so the best he can hope for is that it's a first year he can scare away by being his usual harsh self. 

"Hello? Is somebody in here?"

Of course. 

It's just his fucking luck. 

"Tell me that you're okay in there or I'm coming in..."

"Go away, Naru-kun," he can barely choke out the words, already knowing that Arashi won’t leave. 

But he has to try.

He hasn't fallen that far yet. 

"Izumi-chan?" the curtain gets yanked back and he hears Arashi give a predictably overdramatic gasp. "What...oh, honey, what happened?"

And somehow the concern in that warm voice, the knowledge that Arashi honestly _cares_ and wants to know, makes Izumi cry harder. 

"Can you get the paint off?" Izumi manages to ask through his sobs, curled in a ball with his knees pulled to his forehead. "I want it gone."

"There's not much left..." he feels soft fingers swipe over his shoulders, rubbing a little harder as Arashi lets out a little murmur of frustration. "Did Ou-sama..."

"I don't want to talk about it," Izumi growls, and Arashi must know he's in a foul mood because for once the subject is dropped. "Just get me clean so I can go home."

"I think that'll do," Arashi moves away, footsteps fading and then getting louder again. "Here, dry yourself off. I'll wait outside."

"You don't have to..."

"I'll wait," is the reply, and Izumi huffs in annoyance and grabs the proffered towel, waiting until Arashi's left the locker room before drying off and getting dressed. 

He doesn't really feel any cleaner, hands and skin still stained black, but he knows Arashi wouldn’t lie to him about the paint being gone. 

Arashi doesn't say anything when he comes out, merely holds a hand toward him until Izumi takes it. It's annoying, like Arashi's attempts to mother him always are, but the touch is familiar and Izumi needs that more than anything right now. 

They stay that way until they reach the train station, and when Izumi slides his hand away the look he gets is full of sadness and compassion. 

"Should I talk to him?"

"Fuck no, that's the worst thing you could do. Stay out of my business," he snaps, causing Arashi's expression to harden almost immediately to something haughty and unimpressed. 

"If it affects Knights it _is_ my business," is the reply he gets, and Izumi can't really argue that, but he still doesn't want anybody else trying to help. 

"I'll figure it out," he promises, clearing his throat and shuffling his feet awkwardly. "And thanks. For before."

"Of course," Arashi's voice is kind and soothing once again. "Take care of yourself, okay? I'll see you tomorrow."

This is accompanied by Arashi leaning in and pecking his cheek quickly, and Izumi sputters and growls and mumbles 'annoying' in the most half-hearted way.   
  
But this, at least, is normal, and maybe he feels a _little_ better  
  
He'll never admit it out loud, especially not where Arashi can hear, but that doesn't make it any less true.   


000

  
He manages to mostly avoid Leo after that, something made considerably easier by the fact that they aren't in the same class. Practice isn’t a big issue either since, as long as he doesn’t linger too long afterward, Leo doesn’t have much of a chance to catch him alone.   

And it's fine. It is. He's made it this long without Leo around, after all, so if he has to live out the rest of his life without him...if he has to keep thinking of _this_ 'Leo' as just a stranger that happens to look like the Leo he knew...then so be it. 

He's good at surviving and finding ways to keep going, after all. 

If the others notice (and they do, of _course_ they do, Arashi already knows) they don't say anything, and over time Leo stops trying to talk to him altogether. 

Izumi doesn't miss the attention at all, really. Even on his best days Leo was a billion different kinds of annoying, so cutting that out from his life will only be for the best in the end. 

It's fine. It'll be fine. 

Or, it would have been, if he hadn't had a tiny moment of vulnerability in front of Tsukasa that prompted the brat to say that words that would stay on his mind for weeks to come: 

“ _Although once scattered, if it bloomed once more…a flower with the same roots, could you not come love it again?”_

And he doesn't know if Tsukasa _knows_ ; he doesn't know if Tsukasa has any idea of what he and Leo were like before - before the war, before Leo disappeared, before Izumi decided to close his heart off entirely instead of opening himself up to the chance to be hurt again. 

The truth is, he doesn't know if he ever loved Leo. He thinks Leo might have loved him, or loved whatever it was about him that seemed to inspire Leo to write, but Izumi knows he could never love Leo as he is now. 

The Leo that exists now is a shell of his former self, a ghost inside of an animated corpse that has no business looking and sounding and feeling like _his_ Leo. 

No, Izumi could never love him. Maybe he can't love anybody, but certainly not him. 

The words stick with him anyway, mocking him every time he tries to clear all thoughts of Leo from his mind. 

It doesn't matter, he tells himself firmly. A few more months and he'll be out of this place and will never have to see Leo again. 

All things considered, he can't wait for that day to come.   


000

  
He should have expected that one day fate would decide to fuck with him, but looking back it's his own choice to look in their normal unit practice room one day after tennis club is finished. 

It's late enough that the school is mostly empty, everybody gone either for dinner or for the night entirely, but he can hear thumping coming from inside the room and it would look bad on him if it somebody were trying to sabotage them and he did nothing about it. 

So he peers carefully around the door, feeling anger rise in his chest again because the room is in shambles; there are chairs knocked over and crumpled up pieces of paper everywhere, and the floor has a number of suspiciously dark stains that Izumi's willing to bet are going to be a pain in the ass to clean. 

It's Leo. Because of course it is. Nobody else would make this much of a mess, after all. 

He can still ignore him, he tells himself. He can leave and go home and pretend he never saw anything, be as shocked and annoyed as Arashi and Tsukasa will be the next day when they see the state of the room (because Ritsu would likely just find a clean spot on the floor and fall asleep, so Izumi already knows he'll be no help with cleaning up), but he doesn't. 

Instead he pushes through the door, his feet carrying him forward even as the rational part of his brain - and, if he'd ever admit it, the part of his heart that's afraid of Leo shattering it entirely - is telling him to turn around and go. Leo glances behind him, currently precariously balanced on a chair that's sitting on top of a desk, arms outstretched toward the ceiling like he's reaching for something that's not there. 

"You'll fall, idiot," Izumi drops his bag and reaches to catch Leo's sleeve just as he loses his balance and rather ungracefully lands in Izumi's arms. 

The chair topples off of the desk, crashing loudly to the floor, and judging by the sound he’d heard before Izumi's willing to bet it's not that first time today this has happened. 

"Sena!" Leo sounds surprised, his green eyes wide. 

"What are you even doing?" Izumi sets him carefully on the ground and goes to right the chair, picking up a few stray pieces of paper along the way. 

"I can't hear it," Leo murmurs, voice just soft and broken enough that Izumi has to look at him. "The song...I thought I could once, the one that would call them back here. But nothing's working, and I can't..." he scrubs his hands through his hair, messing it up rather terribly. 

Of course.

Fucking aliens again.

Izumi should have known. 

"So what? Your songs were fine before you took off, they'll be fine now," he grunts, the most praise he'll ever give out loud. 

"No. No, it's gone," Leo slumps to the floor, burying his head into his hands. "I thought you could...but then you..." he mumbles so softly that Izumi thinks he hasn't heard correctly.  “Why won’t they come back for me, get me out of here..."

"Leave, if you want to," Izumi's got no patience to deal with this, not now of all times. "But we're all here right now and if you can't see what's right in front of you, maybe it's better if you go."

"What?" Leo looks up in shock. "You..."

"We waited for our king to come back," Izumi can't stop now that he's finally talking to Leo, now that the weeks and months of anger are getting a chance to explode from where they've been building up for all this time. "We thought you could complete us, that we'd be whole again, but you're not a king anymore. A king wouldn’t abandon his people when they needed him the most. He wouldn’t come back looking for any excuse to leave again. You're not a king, Tsukinaga; you're just a fool," his voice breaks on the last words because he can't even remember the last time he's called Leo by his name. 

But he can't call him his king any longer. 

It would be a lie. 

Leo's eyes are dead when he looks at Izumi next, though whether that's because the words have affected him so deeply or because he wasn't affected by them at all, Izumi doesn't know. 

"I have to go," he softens his voice a little and goes to pick up his bag again, not looking back. 

"You're right."

It's barely a whisper and Izumi knows he shouldn't stop, that he'll regret it if he stops, but he's still too fucking weak to abandon Leo entirely. 

He hates himself for it, now more than ever, but he stops anyway. 

"Maybe I'm not fit to lead you. Or anybody. You made it without me, so what am I but a figurehead that can't even do his job properly," he sounds far more bitter than Izumi's ever heard him. "I thought I could come back and be better, but maybe once something is lost there's no getting it back."

"No. There isn't," Izumi isn't going to coddle him or be falsely reassuring, but the words are eerily reminiscent of Tsukasa's and that perhaps makes his mind up for him. "So stop trying to. Move forward. That's the only way to keep going."

"You haven't changed, I see," Leo's voice has a bit of warmth in it now. He clears his throat, and Izumi hears shuffling and the rustling of papers behind him. "I'm out of things to write on."

"So?" Izumi glances over his shoulder. 

"Sena...no, I won't call you that," he glances down, tapping his chin. "Izumi, then.  I'm not asking you to see me as a king if you can't do it honestly, but will you still be my muse despite that?" he looks almost hesitant, and Izumi for the first time sees him just as another teenage boy that the world has broken down too many times. 

Hearing his name drop so carelessly from Leo's lips makes something in his chest that he'd rather not think about unknot, but maybe he’s finally starting to accept that the boy he'd fallen so hard for and remained unfailingly loyal to would never be the same. 

Nothing stays the same, he knows that all too well, but if there’s the tiniest shred inside of the Leo that stands in front of him now that _hasn’t_ changed...he has to cultivate it, make it bloom again, and maybe then...

Leo holds out his hand, something timid in his eyes that Izumi doesn't like at all, and even if he's going to regret it Izumi drops his bag and strips his shirt off, reaching out to take it. 

It gets him a smile that barely holds a fraction of Leo's normal humour, but Leo's hand is warm in his.  There's still a little life left in Leo's eyes, and Izumi steps closer without hesitating now. 

Leo's hand presses against his chest, fingers spreading out like he's trying to memorize every inch of Izumi's skin. "Come. Sit," he urges, and Izumi moves back. He shifts one of the desks and picks up a fallen chair, taking up the position he'd last held what felt like so long ago now. 

"Do whatever you want," he mumbles into his folded arms, his body relaxing at the first stroke of the paintbrush over his skin. 

Leo's movements are hesitant at first, as if he's not entirely sure what to write. Izumi can hear him breathing, steady and even, until he lets out a little gasp and suddenly the strokes become more frequent. Izumi smiles to himself, not so vain as to think he's cured Leo's proverbial writers' block entirely, but this is closer to the Leo he remembers. 

The lips pressed to his neck, however, are still unsure and almost feather-light, and Izumi knows he has every opportunity to tell Leo to stop - that he'll be his muse, if he desires, but nothing more. 

"Tell me this is okay," Leo murmurs, his hair tickling Izumi's shoulder. "Sena...Izumi, tell me..."

"Yeah. Yeah, 's fine," he grumbles, closing his eyes, and this time Leo's touch has a lot more purpose. 

It's not like he and Leo were ever together or dating or anything, but somehow this... _thing_ had happened between them. It was entirely innocent, and if Izumi's being honest with himself, he hardly minded because otherwise he would never have allowed it in the first place. 

So maybe that Leo still wants this...still wants _him_ , in whatever way it happens to be...is another thing he can point to as being the same as it was. 

Leo's fingers slide down his spine, making Izumi shiver. "I think you’re ruining it."

"Mm, well, the truth is...like you said last time, it really isn't very good. I need to get used to writing things that are worthy of my Knights again," he is voice is so fond now that Izumi can almost, _almost_ feel good about calling himself one of those Knights once more. 

"Ou-sama," he sighs, the name slipping from his lips thoughtlessly. 

"Sena.  My Sena," Leo affirms, and Izumi takes a deep breath before sitting up and turning around. "Can I..."

"Yes," Izumi doesn't hesitate now, reaching for Leo and tangling his fingers in his hair before their lips connect. And having Leo in his arms...this is perhaps the most familiar thing of all. 

Because Leo's incapable of staying still, of being tamed or held down, but there are times he's perfectly content to just... _be_ with Izumi, like Izumi's somebody he's willing to actually stop moving so frantically for, if only for a few moments at a time. 

Izumi fiddles with the tie on Leo's hair until he gets it undone, letting Leo lower them carefully to the floor, both of them streaked with paint now. 

They're a mess, but a beautiful one, and Izumi’s always kind of thought of Leo like that so perhaps it's entirely fitting. 

"Sena..." Leo breaks away, something brilliantly alive in his eyes now when he looks down at Izumi. "I've got it!" 

And then he's up, grabbing the paint and brush again, and Izumi wonders for the millionth time just how inspiration works where Leo's concerned. 

"Your back's all dirty so lie still," he frowns, tongue poking out of the side of his mouth as he starts scribbling across Izumi's chest, and Izumi merely rolls his eyes and lets him do as he will. 

"You're so fucking weird."

"Mm," Leo doesn't sound particularly concerned by that, not that Izumi thought he would be. He reaches to lazily trail his fingers through Leo's hair, not saying anything else until he's finished. "There. Hold still," he digs in his pocket for his phone, and Izumi would feel a little strange about Leo taking pictures of him half-naked and covered in paint except...it's Leo, so he doesn't. 

"Are you done yet?"

"Yep! Thanks," Leo leans in to kiss him again and Izumi closes his eyes and thinks that this...this is something he could easily get used to again.

The parts of Leo he'd fallen for are still there. They're hidden, maybe warped a little, but they haven’t disappeared the way Izumi had feared. 

Maybe he _could_ learn to love him again, to love him as he is _now_ and not cling to who he used to be. 

"Hey, Sena?" Leo was lying on his chest, staring at him intently. "Bring your iPod tomorrow. I'll have something for you," there's a twinkle in his eyes now that makes Izumi admittedly excited.

It’s been so long since he heard Leo’s music. 

He's missed it. 

He doesn’t say that, of course.  He just complains about being dirty and that Leo had better show up early tomorrow so that they can clean up a little bit before the others show up for practice. 

Leo laughs and ignores him, lying on his back on the paint-streaked floor and staring at the picture of Izumi he'd taken, fingers moving through the air like he's playing out a melody that's only in his mind. 

And this is his king, Izumi thinks wryly: this beautiful, broken, utterly brilliant boy that Izumi would follow to the gates of hell and back. 

Yeah. That seems about right.

He lies down beside Leo, resting his head on Leo's shoulder and listening to him hum a disjointed, tuneless melody as the shadows in the room lengthen and the sun begins to set.

The evening light turns Leo’s hair the color of burnished copper, mingling with the silver of Izumi’s own as they lay together.

He’s underestimated Leo’s strength, maybe.  His strength, and his resilience to come back from being kicked down and build himself up again.

The roots of the flower they’ve grown together go far deeper than he’d first realized, and if they can make it bloom again, it’ll be more brilliant and beautiful than ever before.

That much, he can believe with certainty now.

;“You’re being too thoughtful, Sena.  It’s not like you,” Leo pokes his cheek and Izumi growls, swatting his hand away.

“And you’re being impossible.  It’s exactly like you,” he replies, which seems to only prompt Leo to kiss him again, laughing brightly against his lips.

It’s in that moment - bathed in fading sunlight, covered in paint and dust and kissing another boy - that Izumi realizes he doesn’t _need_ to learn to love Leo again, because he’s never stopped.

“Can I call you my muse again?” Leo’s teasing, and Izumi takes his hand and clasps it firmly.

“Can I call you my king again?” Izumi asks softly, as vulnerable as he’ll ever be, and the smile Leo gives him at that is the most beautiful thing Izumi’s ever seen.

“Of course you can.  Sena,” he draws out the name in that unique way of his, the way that makes it sound fond instead of merely impersonal.  “But I’d rather you just call me annoying.”

“You _are_ annoying,” Izumi finally obliges him, pulling him closer, and he knows he’ll be happy to call Leo that anytime he asks.

They both know what he means when he says it, after all.

And that’s one thing that will never change.

**Author's Note:**

> It's been almost two weeks and I still can't stop thinking about Lionheart, so here we are again. Tsukasa's quote in this is from the "Phantom Thieves vs. Detectives" event and is a reply to Izumi talking about how he's lost 'everything he's ever loved' (and a kind anon has informed me that he does mention Leo before this so it probably pertains somewhat to him, but that part of the story isn't translated anywhere I can find so I'll take their word for it!!)
> 
> As always, I'd love to know what you all think, and I hope you enjoyed this piece (and come say hi on [twitter](http://twitter.com/_mikarashis), too, since I'm there most of the time)!


End file.
